8.27.2012

Dear Free-Thinkers: Stop Being Closed-Minded


Dear Liberals, Scientists, Mathematicians, Logicticians and Skeptics:

We get it. You're a "thinker." You like to use your "logic" and things like "evidence" to reach conclusions.

Well, that's great and all, but it's horribly offensive, and I must humbly request on the behalf of all Religious and Belief-oriented people that you stop it. Like, right now.

Look, modern society is changing. Sure, the past few decades have seen drastic changes in the mindset of society. Racism, sexism, bigotry, misogyny and hatred are things that society is on the cusp of actually becoming against. And it's dangerous.

It's quaint that you feel that way, but you need to understand: your insistence that thought replace emotion, evidence replace belief and logic replace assumption is hurting people. It's closed-minded. You can't accept that people with beliefs are predisposed to use those beliefs -- and not YOUR logic and facts -- to draw their conclusions. You can't allow those who believe that a deity (or, a heavily-robed authority figure holding something made of gold) told them what to think, how to feel and ways to act. It's unfair to them.

These days, we must honor and respect the BELIEFS of someone, because to not do so is closed-minded and horrific and mean and terrible and akin to throwing them into the lion's den. In fact, the more you disagree with them, the more you should allow them to speak and dictate the rule of law. It's a personal exercise in open-mindedness.

So fuck your facts, fuck the law, fuck science and fuck math. Beliefs should govern thought, not information. And if you don't respect that, you're a big fat meanie head anti-Patriot un-American terrible Commie terrorist lover.

And if you disagree, I'll forgive you, turn the other cheek, and keep on operating on belief rather than listen to your points, because that's my right as a free-thinker.

And remember, Jesus loves you. Live like he did (except where it's inconvenient and conflicts with your prejudices, in which case just say his father God said it was ok to hate).