The New Gig - My AOL Articles

So far, the response on the articles I've filed with AOLNews has been really great. People seem to be laughing, and I'm getting a good bit of email.

Actually, I'm getting a LOT of email. A metric buttload, in fact. And most of it is nice, but a few of them have been from very, very crazy people. Take, for instance, this woman who wrote in response to the article about the guy finding Jesus in a skillet full of burnt bacon:

-------- Original Message --------
Subject: Message for Joe Peacock
Date: Sat, 13 Mar 2010 09:47:15 EST
From: [redacted]
To: joe@joethepeacock.com

Hi Joe,

I just read the story on the man seeing Jesus in his pan of burnt bacon. It warms my heart to see the way Jesus shows up in the most inconspicuous places for those who believe. My mom says I find Jesus everywhere I go. I don't know if it's me finding Him or Him finding me but I like it.

One day, while I was sitting on my bed and just dazing into nothing I seen a tiny picture of Jesus sitting on my desk. When I seen it I thought how small of a picture it was and didn't remember having a picture of Jesus that little. I pulled at it and it came out easy and it was no picture at all. It was a receipt to a very well known store. If you want to know which store all you have to do is write me back and I'll tell you. If you know or have any idea's which store it is then please let me know. I have intended for years to let the store know but to date have not. Reading this story makes me want to share my story too. It's amazing the power our Lord has and how desperately He wants our love.



...I mean, WOW. And I'm sorry, [redacted], I don't mean to insinuate that I think you're crazy or wrong. It's just that I don't think you really undersand the point of what I do or why I do it. People who see the face of Jesus in anything aren't necessarily to be avoided - I mean, I can see the face of Jesus in the things people see the face of Jesus in. It looks like Jesus because it looks like Jesus. No brainer.

I just don't put any value to it. It's a clever way of painting a picture, I guess... But I think if God wants to send us signs, things like this are pretty silly mediums when you have volcanoes, earthquakes, and world-ending meteors at your disposal.

Plus, I think that any message from the divine beyond really should be more important than a simple "Hi there, just thinking of you." I want the secrets to life and a reason for existing, not "Yo Dawg, I know you pray for bacon, so I put my face in it so you can worship while you worship."

And yeah, I'm taking shots at other journalists and traditional media in my Fark-releated pieces. Because that's what Fark is all about - but more than that, it's because I'm sick to death of fluff and nonsense being bandied about like it's news. I do realize this is the internet, and as such, there's an infinite amount of space for an infinite amount of crap to be published - but videos of cats playing pianos with an orchestrated accompanyment are not the same as "news organizations" doing everything except reporting actual news.

It's not a content issue, it's a context issue. And yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm making enemies. It's nothing new; I've been doing that since I was a teenager. I routinely target things I never want any part of and hack at them with impunity.

I'm not really a fan of burning bridges... I prefer to take them out with a missle launcher before I even get to them.