Politics as an Intelligence Test

For those of you who have, either knowingly or unwittingly, spared yourselves from the "news" that the Republicans have come back to Obama with their own draft of the "budget":

The Republicans have come back to Obama with their own draft of the "budget". 

Now, as you know, I'm an artsy fartsy writer type, so I'm sure you're catching on to the fact that I keep putting the word "budget" in "quotes". And if you've read their draft of the budget, you know exactly why. If you haven't, well... Let me spare you the suspense:

It's not a budget. It's a 17 page talking points memo full of charts that make NO FUCKING SESNE based on not an single ounce of actual data.

THAT IS A REAL CHART FROM THE REAL BUDGET. WHAT THE FUCK?!? (Full disclosure: I actually showed this to my wife, a statistics major and former actuary, before I included it here, just to be sure what I was seeing is what I thought I saw. She confirmed it by looking at it,and then looking up at me and saying "what the hell is that?")

The entire thing reads like a junior high school student's political debate rebuttal. It's retarded. And this thing is from the other major political party governing our nation. And before any of you try to argue that this was just a proposal, let me point out that John Boehner said "Obama said we didn't have a budget, here it is" and presented the document linked above. That means it's a budget.

While it's been alluded to before by myself and others throughout history, I believe that, for the first time here in 2009, individual political affiliation can be used as a fairly sufficient litmus test for intelligence. 

Not because I believe the Democrats are smart. I don't. One visit to Los Angeles, Berkeley, Portland or any other major city with 90% "blue" population will show you this. There are some really, really stupid liberals out there. 

But, at this point in our nation's history, I have to -- not want to, but HAVE TO -- be of the opinion that if you knowingly support the Republican party, you are a moron.

I do not care what schools you've attended, what degrees you have, what you do for a living... You HAVE TO BE A MORON TO BE SUPPORTING THESE GUYS. Either that, or you just plain hate yourself. 

Want proof? Here you go (For those of you who are too lazy to click links [or too stupid to know how... REPUBLICANS...], the article is about two articles written as rebuttals to Obama's budget, by two different authors, that are identical word for word. Like I said, stupid). Even more proof - in the wake of "This wasn't actually a budget, we misspoke," The Republicans have RE-promised to deliver a budget... On April Fool's Day. Last proof: Joe the Plumber has a career, and fuck you ALL for putting that meathead fucktard on my television.

By the way, I'm not alone here. Read what Fark and Nate Silver have to say.

I want to make it clear - I don't hate Republicans. I pity them (as I do anyone who goes and hangs a label on themselves like this). They've lost their minds. Anyone who is so blindly adherent to an affiliation as their identity that they can't recognize the very poor theater troupe that this political party has become and divorce themselves from it... You are just sad.

You guys don't have to go change your core views of how you think a government should run, and I know a number of Republicans who cling dearly to the idea of the party that their parents had and for whatever reason, still think that today's Republican party is the embodiment of those beliefs. THEY ARE NOT. Those days are over. Today's neo-con controlled Republican party dress themselves in the clothes of the past and preach to you what you believe, while living an altogether different lifestyle with its own agenda. What the Republicans did to this nation and its Constitution from 2000-2008 is abhorrent. And what they've become since the populace heaved their ass through the front picture window of the national saloon is just pathetic. 

If you're still one of them... You deserve it. All of it. Everything coming to you. Everything happening to you. The horrible misery you subject yourself to daily, hating everything that's happening in this nation for the sake of hating it... You deserve it. Enjoy it.