2.10.2008

The Grammys are big big bullshit

The fact that Amy Winehouse is anywhere near a list that contains past names such as Stevie Wonder and The Beatles and Etta James just proves that the whole Grammy experience is nothing more than a bought-and-paid-for hype machine, no different than JD Powers and Associates awards for "Car Manufacturer of the Year Who Could Afford To Buy Our Marketing... Er... Award".

Pathetic.

The state of music has been declining over the past 25 years in a huge way, but now, it's patently offensive. The industry is flaunting this marketing hype machine in everyone's faces, practically daring you to point out to them that they're the ones buying their artists' own records to propel their shrinkwrapped shit to the top of a bought-and-paid-for Billboard list, so that play on the radio increases to the point that it starts making these top 40 lists that convince you to think everyone's asking to hear this crap when in actuality, it's just "the best of what has been approved for play on our station".

Turn off the radio.

Go grab these albums (and just to prove I don't go hiding in the underground to claim some sort of "music cred", this list is chock full of stuff that charted. See, I DO listen to mainstream stuff, Jeremy):

The Melvins - Houdini
Stevie Wonder - Innervisions
The Beatles - Revolver
Dave Brubeck - Time Out
Thelonious Monk - Brilliant Corners
Battles - Mirrored
Kings of Leon - Because of the Times
De La Soul - Three Feet High And Rising
Helmet - Meantime
Smashing Pumpkins - Siamese Dream
Van Morrison - Astral Weeks
Black Sabbath - any of the first 6 records
Led Zeppelin - holy shit, anything
The Who - Who's Next
Rolling Stones - Exile on Main Street
Jeff Buckley - Grace
Matthew Sweet - Girlfriend
Van Halen - any of the first for records
Radiohead - The Bends and OK Computer (ignore anything after OK, it's just masturbatory nonsense that art rock snob kids like to lord over everyone like they know something about music)
Silversun Pickups - Carnavas
At The Drive-In - In Casino Out and Relationship of Command
Bob Dylan - everything until 1979
R.E.M. - Murmur and Reckoning (and Automatic for the People, but I hesitate to suggest that one because everyone tends to cling to it, and it's not their best... But it's good)
U2 - Achtung Baby, October, Boy and The Passengers - Original Soundtracks Volume 1 (and of course, the Joshua Tree - one of the highlights of the Grammys actually getting something right)
The Low End Theory - A Tribe Called Quest
Parlament / Funkadelic - One Nation Under A Groove (and anything else, ever)
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Everything up to Blood Sugar Sex Majik (and you shoudl SPECIFICALLY avoid everything after, because it's all shit)

This is just off the top of my head.

Feel free to email me if you want more suggestions of stuff that doesn't blow. Or, you know... Keep watching award shows full of what the corporations want you to buy tomorrow. Because God knows, someone's gotta give Fall Out Boy something to do with their lives.