7.05.2006

I've fucking had it with Comcast.

So!

Here's what I've done:

1) I've called Bellsouth and DirecTV and had them agree to come out and install services that I'll be equally pissed off at inside of 3 months.

2) I called Comcast and waited on hold for - and i'm not joking - 43 minutes before I was able to talk to someone to cancel my shit.

3) I knew that was going to happen. I've had to cancel Comcast in the past. So, I planned ahead.

4) I recorded the entire song "Holy Diver" by Dio onto my Treo - only, I've screwed with the levels quite a lot, so it's unnecessarily loud - thus, it's fuzzy and annoying and pretty much unlistenable.

5) And then I told the cancellation operator "Can you hold for me just one moment?" and went to my media player and let him get an earful of MOTHERFUCKING DIO!

6) I then came here, to my journal, to start posting what's happening with the hold clerk. From this point forward, you are getting live updates of my fun with Comcast.

7) He just began asking me why I'm unhappy with the service. I've explained that, for the past 3 days, the second the sun comes up over the horizon, my internet and phone go out (but tv is fine... wierd). I call Comcast. They tell me it's due to service being done in the area. I then ask for a refund for the day, and they tell me either that they can't do it because it's normal maintainence, or I have to call back once service comes up so they know how much to credit me. Both answers are bullshit.

8) He's going into his "I'll give you a free month spiel, so here comes some DIO!

9) He's getting the HOLY DIVER experience right now. I think i'll give him 45 seconds of it.

10) Blogger isn't playing nice, it's not letting me know when it's updated this post. Oh well, here's me taking it on faith that you're able to read the fun I'm having with Comcast.

11) I don't really know why I'm using a numeric list to write this crap, either. But I've already started, and daddy didn't raise no quitter.

12) The Comcast guy has just asked that I not put him on hold, as "The music is very loud and hard to hear." I've replied "Yeah, Comcast's music is annying, isn't it? You should have them change it." He's replied "No, I mean yours." I said "Oh, yeah, that's actually why I'm cancelling, forget that part about your service sucking, I'm cancelling because of your hold music - I can't fucking stand Dio."

13) I've put him on hold again. RIDE THE TIGER!

14) He just hung up on me. A CUSTOMER SERVICE REP HUNG UP ON ME!

Looks like I get to call them again. More once I get connected.

15) I've changed songs - It's now "Rainbow in the Dark." Just a rainbow in the dark. No sign of the morning.

16) Wow, only 12 minutes on hold this time. This lady seems nice.

17) She wants to offer me a free month as well. Here's some DIO, bitch.

18) She didn't really like it. She asked if I had any Luthur Vandross. I said "Huh? No, I don't listen to rock and roll." She didn't get it.