You know what? Goddamn the Gap.

Yes, that's right! I've called upon God the Almighty to pay special attention to and personally damn a chain clothing store. And you know why?

It's not because of that sewn-in alarm tag that got me in trouble the other day. It's not because of the prep-chic that they spawn. It's not the overly trendy and "hip" commercials that they run on TV.

It's the goddamn button fly on the pants I just bought.


Not only are they harder to get into and out of, they also led to a very embarassing situation this afternoon. The stupid middle button didn't fasten after a visit to the urinal in the office I share with some folks, and so they hung open.

Along with the flap in my boxers.

Let's just say that a few folks I passed in the hallway got a small glimpse of 'Lil Joe this afternoon.

Fucking Gap.