I am eating a "breakfast sandwich" which contains "Canadian" bacon, some reconstituted eggs, and bread which houses pockets of "real maple syrup" within. And to top it all off, there's a gigantic stylized "M" burned into the top of it. And to drink? A delicious sweetened and iced tea.

All for $1.99.

I'm lovin' it.

Except that I can feel the murmurs and palpatations forming in my heart as I type this.