One really, REALLY unexpected concequence from leaving my job:

I had a really bad caffeine withdrawl crash last week.

Now, I know it sounds ridiculous. First, who the heck has caffeine withdrawl, and second, how bad could it possibly be?

Well, while working at my old job, I went through - and this is no lie, everyone who worked with me can confirm - at least 2 pots of coffee a day. By myself. I drank it like crazy, every single day of the week, for about 4 years (with the exception of certain holidays or vacation where I didn't have access to a coffee maker, whereupon I'd go in search of the nearest diner or Starbucks to get my fix).

It's usually presumed that a regular cup of coffee contains 100mg of caffeine. A usual pot of coffee contains 12 cups of coffee, meaning 1200mg of caffeine. Two pots a day = 2400mg of caffeine A DAY that I was ingesting (on most days).

When I left my job a week and a half ago, I didn't bother to clean out my old coffee maker or make provisions for my coffee habit. I subsisted mostly on Propel water (shut up, it's really good and does the whole "give you liquids" job pretty well) and diet Barq's root beer. After the weekend, I started to notice this pretty intense yet dull headache forming at the base of my neck.

It lasted a week. It was like a migrane, only you can actually function during it - albeit poorly. A weeklong headache throbbing in your ears at the base of your neck... It's very not good.

It's finally died down a good bit. The way I know it had to be caffeine withdrawl - the only other time in my life I've felt anything like this was when I was doing the Atkins diet about 4 years ago, and I quit caffeine cold turkey. I felt like CRAP for about 4 days when someone finally explained why - my body was going through withdrawl.

From CoffeeFaq:


What are the symptoms of caffeine withdrawal?

Regular caffeine consumption reduces sensitivity to caffeine. When caffeine intake is reduced, the body becomes oversensitive to adenosine. In response to this oversensitiveness, blood pressure drops dramatically, causing an excess of blood in the head (though not necessarily on the brain), leading to a headache.

This headache, well known among coffee drinkers, usually lasts from one to five days, and can be alleviated with analgesics such as aspirin. It is also alleviated with caffeine intake (in fact several analgesics contain caffeine dosages).

Often, people who are reducing caffeine intake report being irritable, unable to work, nervous, restless, and feeling sleepy, as well as having a headache. In extreme cases, nausea and vomiting has also been reported.


Caffeine and Health. J. E. James, Academic Press, 1991. Progress in Clinical and Biological Research Volume 158. G. A. Spiller, Ed. Alan R. Liss Inc, 1984.


It's insane.

So, will I start it back up again, now that I'm over the "shakes"? You're goddamn right I will. I love coffee, and if this is the price I have to pay to be without it, I'm hooking up an I.V.


What I want to know - and I'm serious, I really, really want to know - is how the hell half a hamburger ended up on the drink coaster on my desk.

At home.

And I don't mean "half" as in "half eaten", I mean "half" as in "the meat and the top bun."

I'm... Seriously, I'm without words.

I'm... Manohman. Seriously, I'm without words.

Well, except for these.


Everyone's asked "How does it feel, your first day without a job?"

Let's see... the only way to describe it really is this:

It hasn't really set in yet. It feels like I've called in sick to work, or am taking a few extra days of vacation. It's a lot like when you graduate high school... You know you've graduated and that you never have to go back, but it doesn't REALLY set in until the next school year, when you see the busses running and you're not on one.

I still feel sort of like I'm waiting to "leave" the job, and it's still the weekend or something. This is the first time since I was 13 years old that I haven't had some sort of job (when I was 13, my dad hired me to pull weeds and paint the stripes in the parking lot at his office buliding for 5.00 an hour, and from that point forward, I've always had some form of employment). That's really the wierdest part... Not having someone to report to.

Anyway, that's it for "more random crap you don't care about." Join me next week when I detail my favorite flavor of Dunkin' Donuts Munchkins (blueberry... hell yeah).


What can Brown do for you?

Well, for starters, they can fuck shit up completely.

THEN, they can apologize profusely, but not do anything to fix things.

AND THEN, they can say they DID try to fix it but somehow things screwed up with the fixing and that things are now definitely fixed.

There were about 650 hardcover books ordered for direct shipment to me from the printer. This load weighs about 750 or 800 lbs total. To move the books around better, UPS palletized the books (put them all on one wooden pallete and bound them together).

This I understand.

Now, since all those boxes on the pallete were going to one address, some GENIUS up there assumed - because of the new bundle - that the delivery method changed to "Customer pickup - liftgate access." This means I'd come up there with my own lift-gate truck and pick them up.

This, I do NOT understand.

I mean, I get that almost all shipments that wind up on the same pallate and are wrapped together end up being customer pick-up orders. But I didn't ask for this. There is no request for this in the system. It makes NO sense.

But they did thank me for using UPS. Which was nice, I thought. Fuckers.

I now know why they chose Brown as their color and motto.


Well... Can you believe it?

My rapalicious 1337 random IM person is BACK! And she's MAD! Because I posted her conversations on my journal!

Well, not really. But she pretended to be. And of COURSE, I simply had to post the follow-up. So here you go.

xo_misszdre_xo: dude I barely realized you put OUR conversation on ur paqe!!!!!! how sad. aww, I thouqht we shared a common interest in many thinqs in life. how could u? how DARE you? u shall pay for this with ur life, I`ll hunt you down and eat ur insides and feed the rest to my pet doq Ash. don`t bother, sorry doesn`t do it. it never did!
joe: ?
joe: who is this?
xo_misszdre_xo: dRe
joe: dre?
joe: do I know a doctor e?
xo_misszdre_xo: uqhh
xo_misszdre_xo: don`t add a dr to itt
xo_misszdre_xo: have u listened to my brother`s cd lately? ;D
xo_misszdre_xo: John Got`ti
xo_misszdre_xo: shuddup, how can u 4qet about ME
xo_misszdre_xo: DRE
xo_misszdre_xo: UR LIFE
xo_misszdre_xo: UR EVERYTHING
xo_misszdre_xo: UR SOUL
joe: oh, THIS PERSON.
xo_misszdre_xo: UR SUN & MOON
xo_misszdre_xo: jp
joe: yes, I put you on my site
joe: and you were also in a magazine
xo_misszdre_xo: err...
xo_misszdre_xo: :O
joe: you're famous, you should be glad.
xo_misszdre_xo: :O
xo_misszdre_xo: :O
xo_misszdre_xo: I Can`t believe youuuuu
joe: why?
joe: it was hilarious.
xo_misszdre_xo: :o
xo_misszdre_xo: :o!!!!
xo_misszdre_xo: I shall hold resentment towards you for the rest of my life!
joe: aww, don't be that way
joe: people love you
joe: I have received fanmail about you
xo_misszdre_xo: jp.. nah todaii I was in class and I looked up my old screen name, and I saw ur paqe, and I was like OMG
xo_misszdre_xo: are you serious?
xo_misszdre_xo: sayinq what?!?!?!
xo_misszdre_xo: people probably hate me
joe: no way
joe: I got a few emails saying you sounded cute
joe: one was even from a girl
joe: you know, if you're into that
xo_misszdre_xo: they probably think I`m iqnorant
xo_misszdre_xo: really?
xo_misszdre_xo: hotness ;]
joe: seriously! You're internet-famous.
joe: just like ME
xo_misszdre_xo: :-l
xo_misszdre_xo: not kewl
joe: except I can write in real english
xo_misszdre_xo: :|
xo_misszdre_xo: oh
xo_misszdre_xo: have u noticed
joe: me?
joe: noticed what
xo_misszdre_xo: I DoNt TyPe LiKe tHiS N e MoRe
xo_misszdre_xo: ;D
joe: oh, cool
joe: did you download the AOL 9.0 update with the l33tp4tch?
xo_misszdre_xo: flj398r734? oh nah
xo_misszdre_xo: I don`t like aol
xo_misszdre_xo: I like yahoo
joe: oh
joe: I didn't know yahoo had the 1337 patch
xo_misszdre_xo: um..
xo_misszdre_xo: yeeahhh
xo_misszdre_xo: idk
xo_misszdre_xo: hmm...what do u think about bisexuals?
joe: I could go either way
joe: why
xo_misszdre_xo: you qo either way?
joe: I could
xo_misszdre_xo: just wonderinq
joe: or I could not
xo_misszdre_xo: do you?
joe: I could go either way on that
xo_misszdre_xo: wait, are you sayinq ur bi too?
joe: binaural?
joe: or bicoastal?
xo_misszdre_xo: what`s that?
joe: yeah!
xo_misszdre_xo: what is this??
joe: what is what
xo_misszdre_xo: binaural & bicoastal?
joe: Yeah, both!
xo_misszdre_xo: WHAT ISSSS THATT sir?
joe: or ma'am
xo_misszdre_xo: so u like men & females?
joe: sure, got nothing against them
xo_misszdre_xo: I`m sayinq u would date them?
xo_misszdre_xo: ur have intercourse?
xo_misszdre_xo: or*
xo_misszdre_xo: wow...
xo_misszdre_xo: that`s hot
joe: I have intercourse
joe: of course of course
joe: and who ever heard of an inter course
joe: unless of course that inter course is THE FAMOUS MR. ED
xo_misszdre_xo: qosh ur not answerinq me, u are but then aqain ur not
joe: yep, I'm bilateral
xo_misszdre_xo: awesomeness =xo_misszdre_xo: so when r u qonna let me read MY fanmail sir?
joe: oh, I already had it forwarded to that address you gave me
xo_misszdre_xo: which address?
xo_misszdre_xo: wuuut in the hell are you talkinq about
joe: that one with the catalogue
xo_misszdre_xo: whaat?
joe: in pueblo
joe: the one!
xo_misszdre_xo: ur trippin now
joe: come on, don't prank me
joe: you're pranking me right now, aren't you
xo_misszdre_xo: noo I promise
xo_misszdre_xo: are u serious or are you playinq?
joe: you're going to put this on your journal, OMG3y34Mh0tt.blogspot.yahoo.co.uk.jp
joe: and you're going to embarass me
joe: god
joe: now I can't talk to you, pranker
xo_misszdre_xo: lmfaoo
xo_misszdre_xo: lmaoo wttttfffff
xo_misszdre_xo: wowwwww
xo_misszdre_xo: ur TOO much
xo_misszdre_xo: I don`t even understand you riqht now=xo_misszdre_xo: qawd..
xo_misszdre_xo: so hows life been sir?
joe: life
joe: as in prison?
joe: are you pranking me from prison???
xo_misszdre_xo: no
joe: what the hell... my tax dollars are going to give you inmates free internet from Yahoo.co.uk.jp.cx
joe: this is an OUTRAGE
joe: I'm Bipolar over it!
xo_misszdre_xo: US inmates
xo_misszdre_xo: qawd why I qotta be awll that?!
joe: wait.
xo_misszdre_xo: ;[
joe: are you using 'q' instead of 'g'?
joe: did someone switch the keys or something?
xo_misszdre_xo: qawwwwwd
xo_misszdre_xo: no
xo_misszdre_xo: :">..
joe: do you have to conciously do that?
xo_misszdre_xo: why must u always make fun of the way I type
joe: or did you just learn it that way
joe: I dunno, cause it's silly
xo_misszdre_xo: =xo_misszdre_xo: I quessss
xo_misszdre_xo: I would make fun of my homeqirl for typinq like that and it qot stuck with me
joe: your homesquirrel
xo_misszdre_xo: I qot tired of havinq to erase the Q`s for G`s so I left it like that
xo_misszdre_xo: my home skillet biscuit.
joe: they're feeding inmates skillet biscuits now?
joe: what the FUCK
xo_misszdre_xo: why must we be inmates?
joe: GRUEL!!! Nothing but gruel for you, you hardened felon
joe: I dunno, because you're pranking me from jail
xo_misszdre_xo: because we listen to rap
joe: you're the one who did the crime
joe: now you gotta do the time
xo_misszdre_xo: and because my brother is the black john gotti
joe: you're in jail with your brother?
xo_misszdre_xo: what is u talkinq abouuuuuuuuut?!?!?!!?!? WHAT crime!!?
joe: what, is it a co-ed jail?
xo_misszdre_xo: No
xo_misszdre_xo: oh lawd..
joe: now I'm surrendering tax dollars for a co-ed jail.
joe: next you'll tell me you get Bill O'Reilly in there
xo_misszdre_xo: fer sure
joe: and now, you've gone all valley girl
xo_misszdre_xo: que es eso?
xo_misszdre_xo: wtf is a valley qirl?
joe: valley qirl sounds like some 80's cheese snack
xo_misszdre_xo: I`m lactose intolerant
xo_misszdre_xo: I don`t do cheese
joe: not even between your toes?
joe: ok, I gotta go
joe: don't even worry about googling your new screenname
xo_misszdre_xo: please.
joe: there's NO WAY this log will go up on my site!!!!!!!!!!!
joe: no way!
joe: nuh-uh
xo_misszdre_xo: thank you!
joe: not gonna happen
joe: seriously
joe: for at least like 4 minutes
joe: nope
joe: not possible
xo_misszdre_xo: uhh
xo_misszdre_xo: thanks mucho yo
joe: holla